plain old pleasant.

Joy is such a pleasant emotion.

To me, pure joy is..

being completely satisfied

~almost over-satisfied~

with anything and everything.

JOYOUS.

Picture it in your mind.

I see a person skipping;

Smiling ear to ear with every

Step.

Jump.

Step.

Jump.

And without knowing anything about them,

you can see they are happy.

Their smile is a window to their soul.

Shining through that window is

Pleasantness.

Because joy is pleasant.

It is such a pleasant emotion.

generic title.

With these swollen eyes of mine,
You can tell i've been crying.
And with a heart beat this fast,
You would think I was dying.
The blood's rushing through my veins
At possibly the speed of light.
How come everything I do,
Never turns out right?

February Tenth, Two-Thousand and Ten ♥♥

Those North Carolina plains
Will be the only thing between us.

I can't even begin to put in words all of the feelings I have developed for you this past month or so. I knew from the day that I met you, that I wanted to make you mine. I know at first, we didn't start off so good. I'm pretty sure you hated me. But that one day you came to my house with Dylan and Krystal, I'm ever so glad I kissed you. I've never felt so close to one person in such a little amount of time. It feels as though we've been together my whole life. I'm so comfortable around you. Your smile drives me insane. Because it reminds me of how truly lucky I am to have ever had the chance of even getting to know you. I hope when you come back, we can get back to where we are now. It would kill me to lose you over a little distance. So one month, and you'll be back. And that month, will be hell. But we'll talk everyday and continue to love each other. Please don't let the countryside take you away from me. I couldn't last one day without you being mine. Thirty days, that's all you get. And then you can never leave again<3

these chains are permanent, im guessing.

i am grounded once again. i would really like to know why my parents feel the need to ground me EVERY SINGLE WEEK. i'm probably grounded 85% percent of each year. and for the dumbest little things.
-forgetting lined paper at school
-for holding my phone
-saying "i'm sad" on facebook
-posting a picture of me with my mouth open
does anybody else get grounded for this? I THINK NOT. maybe they're just grounding me so they have a reason to spend "quality" time with me. which would be twice as dumb as the reason for grounding me. when i'm grounded, all i do is sit on the computer, eat, and sleep. i don't even look at my parents, let alone spend time with them. why would i want to waste my day sitting there, watching them waste their lives on facebook games. i could be out with my friends, making my self known, achieving my goals, or overcoming my depression and anxiety- which i got from being grounded in the first place. i really hope they read this. i really hope they finally understand that what they think is helping me, is really pushing me farther into the depths of a mental breakdown.

debbie downers: this is for you.

why is depression so common in teenagers these days? it seems like every website i'm on, there's at least ten people who are down in the dumps, maybe more. but i'm starting to think not ALL of these kids can be depressed. like sure, they're sad because of friends, family, whatever. but odds are, only one of them is actually depressed. don't post sad bulletins, statuses, etc. talking about how unhappy you are, because i'm getting sick of you guys striving for attention through your so-called mental instabilities.

and what really bothers me most, is that people fall for it. and they do the nice thing by talking to you about it. when really, you just need to suck it up. you act like your life is the worst when really you're just being a snotty little crap. rub some dirt on it, and save the help for people who really need it.

s.o.s

I am sick and tired of all the drama I have to go through just to be a part of this family. They hurt me almost every single day, and wonder why i'm always so depressed. They blame all my problems on my friends, when really, my friends are the only ones helping me. Why do I even try? This family is obviously doing nothing good for me. So why do I continue to put myself through this? Because i'm forced to. By law, I have to suffer through this for a few more years. But forcing myself to deal with all this crap is unhealthy (from my point of view). "Forcing." Why do I feel the need to use that word? Because that's the way it is. I don't have any control over my life and it's really starting to effect me, mentally. I am losing it. And i'm really scared.

sing with me.

Music is the only thing children like me can rely on these days. People throw the phrase "music is my life" around like it's going out of style. Music touches me. Deep down in my crevices, is a song. My song. It drives me. It's my creation; something only i can sing along to, listen to, dance to, and live with. The song of my life. Every single day it is edited and rewritten. Every move adds a new line. My song's had many verses, bridges, and choruses. The one's that didn't harmonize, were carefully removed. My actions that can't change, are already in the final copy. The final copy shall be played at my funeral. For all to hear. To touch those who got the privilege to get to know me, and make those who never had that chance, to realize my true potential. My musical potential. Hopefully my song hits the top of the charts.